Sup, biznatches!? What you all been up to? Enough about you all, on October 12 we here at Ugh Metal experienced that great masked band. NOT Slipknot. The band that we saw was the one doing the masked gimmick before Slipknot, Cleveland’s own Mushroomhead. That night was a lineup that was much bigger than anticipated. On that note, the Klown shall acknowledge this show, henceforth, as HeadFest. Let that soak in a bit because the Klown was soaked that night, literally.
First off, let me start by giving a quick mention to The No Name Gang, our beloved locals. On their fourth year of existence, this band has made quite a name for themselves. It’s also worth noting that this is John Haskins’, the vocalist for Theosis, other band. Unlike Haskins’ role in Theosis, he is the lead guitarist and backup vocalist of the Gang.
The Gang’s performance, albeit short, left the Brick satisfied enough and reeled in a hefty capacity to get the shindig started for the next performers. Before their departure, the Gang couldn’t simply depart from their already limited time without playing “Authority N/A” from their EP No Man’s Land. It’s also worth noting that on that night, the Gang and those in attendance said their farewells to bassist Mike “Doggnutz” Ciminello.
Jenny Oh: This one goes out to you, Doggnutz! *pours out a can of Alpo*
Chuggo: Uh…What the hell?
J: I would like to play and be part of this convo.
C: I was just about to talk about Contortion.
J: Ah yes, it was nice seeing those classy gents, again!
C: I thought I was doing this one and… do you always carry a can of Alpo with you!?
J: Yes… just in case LaVey sneaks up on me *cough* and in between paychecks *cough*
C: Anyway… it was great seeing Contortion, again. They once again, managed to impress us but also put on a great performance despite their short time.
J: The cherry on top was their new single, “Anti-Virus.” That song reminded me of an earlier Every Time I Die.
J: Uh… What?
C: I say they sound like Trivium.
J: If you didn’t have that wig so far up your ears, you would hear that they sound like a young Every Time I Die!
C: Jen your accuracy is like your financial situation, nonexistent… *slap fight ensues*
J: Enough tomfoolery! As the winner of this slap fight, let’s move on to Death Division
C: As a big guy I would like to say, Jerry Montano, you sir, stole the F’n show!
J: Move over Hanna Montana! It’s all about Jerry Montano… that’s what the kids are still into, right? Right.
C: Right…? Anyway, he was the most energetic and vocal bassist I’ve seen. Not all props to him, though. Props for the prop dragon they used.
J: I shall trade 4 Death Division stickers and a lemon, for one of those light-up platforms. Y’know… the ones that would light up when stepped on?
C: Yeah… I found it funny that at the beginning they used Frank Sinatra’s “Young At Heart.” But the dragon was a nice addition to their final performance. Worth noting, that the last song before the free shit was handed out, was “The Truth.” Good song.
J: Thanks for the free CD and stickers, guys. Call me if you want to make that trade, I mentioned!
C: After Death Division surprised us, we got another surprise…
J: You finally got to see your lady love, again. Sure, she doesn’t know you exist but…
C: Fuck. You. Raven and I have history together…
J: You mean the five seconds our lowly assistants interacted with her? Wow, some history!
C: I also had that time for the camera… that’s more time there, betch!
J: You’re clearly “Damaged” and I recalled my assistant getting the hug. So, clearly I had the connection by association.
C: The “Voices” say otherwise. They say it was meant to be!
J: I’ve said this “13” times, You. Are. Crazy. Raven and her dark disciples stole the show. Catching everyone off guard, their performance blew me away and didn’t know what to expect. They’re Kittie done right. Raven Black makes the angsty 90’s chick inside me rejoice.
C: The Klown would also like to add that Raven also stole the show and my…. Heart!
J: Oh brother… get a hold of yourself, she don’t want you.
C: *flips off Jenny Oh* But in a serious note, Raven Black is definitely a treat to bestow upon. If you ever get a chance to hear them, you will not be disappointed. Now, moving away from the love of my life, let’s talk about the Klown’s other chick Jackie LaPonza of Cleveland’s Unsaid Fate.
J: She may look like a princess but she’s all thug! If you’re expecting typical love songs from or stereotypical “girl songs” from LaPonza, you’re in for a surprise. Cuz she don’t play around. She will kick your ass Chuggo, so don’t call her baby!
C: Sounds kinky… reminds me of Raven’s offer to kick me with her boot. But Unsaid Fate offer a fresh take on Nu Metal.
J: Jackie‘s showmanship was off the charts. They had the crowd jumping around like a pod of dolphins after a coke binge.
C: Yeah… reminds me of that time I broke in to Sea World. Also on that note reminds me of her performance of her hit song “Our Addiction.” Once again, major props to Jerry Montano for lending his bass to Unsaid Fate.
J: Now let’s talk about Pinhead’s eccentric and estranged brother from Sunflower Dead.
C: Yeah, Michael Del Pizzo… I think I understand why he and Pinhead don’t speak. But I gotta hand it to him, the man had energy.
J: I think cutting ties with the Cenobites was the best thing that ever happened to him. He finally got to pursue that musical career he wanted. He blossomed and became his own man. I’m really glad he made those stray Juggalos his band mates too; they can now bask in the limelight.
C: The Klown regrets not pursuing the musical career with him… to be fair the Klown has no musical talent. Anyway, their performance was great. It was Mushroomhead light. Of course the band as a whole is a spectacle but their music is still the cherry on top.
J: Del Pizzo was a spectacle on his own. You can watch that guy for hours… in a non stalker way.
C: Speaking of stalking, the thing that I did not see coming was the band’s rendition of “I’ll Be Watching You.” At first, I thought the accordion was going to be the main attraction but then guitarist, Jaboo, started playing the opening riffs to the song, stealing the show.
J: I thought the accordion was going to be used more but that’s ok. Del Pizzo’s spaz attacks along with joining fans in the pit, was the main attraction.
C: Yeah… still can’t get the images of a bunch of metal heads singing along to “I’ll Be Watching You.” Especially that burly, badass looking dude singing along to it, he sang it with a passion and had a tear in his eye.
J: Ah yes, truly an unforgettable moment. Now moving on to the headliners of Headfest, you know the masked dudes from that one place by that one big Erie lake.
C: Once “Qwerty” kicked off, all bets were off. Those water drums left us wetter than an overused towel in the community pool.
J: Watch out, Andrew W.K.! Though they didn’t need to bang those drums to make their fandom wet after they unleashed their classics such as “Bwomp,” “Solitaire/Unraveling,” and “Sun Doesn’t Rise.”
C: After getting soaked, we were “Becoming Cold.” This is still one of the Klown’s personal favorite songs. He sang along to the whole performance.
J: Didn’t your therapist recommend you stopped doing the whole third person thing? You have problems.
C: Your wallet has problems!
J: *cough* you’re a puppet *cough* It was a nice and intimate touch when Jackie LaPonza from Unsaid Fate joined the stage in a beautiful pink gown and her powdered wig for “One More Day.”
C: The living spirit of Marie Antoinette was there, it was bitchin’.
J: Minus the alleged treason.
C: She joined them onstage once before for “We Are the Truth” as her bad self. Percussionist Roberto Diablo was super awesome and funny as hell.
J: Now that we know just how wet and wild their shows get, be sure to bring your bikini top next time.
C: I have a halter top, betch! Hope they come back to us again, my inner teenage mime was happy to see them. Yes, I was a mime. Mushroomhead helped me become the Klown you know and worship today.